To Be A Doyle
by To Thine Own Self Be True101
Summary: All the significant moments in his life, from learning to ride a trike, to playing the piano to living with Emily and Emily having more kids. All the moments it takes for Declan to define what it means to be a Doyle, because a Warrior doesn't have to do bad.
1. Chapter 1

**These one shots are in no particular order, just significant events in Declan's life that made him who he was. This first one does have reference to domestic violence. Also I am aware that Emily finding out who Declan really is didn't happen this way. **

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One

**She'll Make a Nice Mam**

He was three years old when he first met Lauren Reynolds, he remembered hiding behind the couch as his father came in with the dark haired woman. He smiled to himself, _maybe she'd make a nice Mam. _He thought to himself. He saw his father speaking softly to her as he peered around the corner.

"Declan." His father's familiar voice called. "Come on out boy you need to meet someone." Declan walked out from around the couch and looked up at the woman. "Lauren this is my house keeper, Louise's boy, his name is Declan. Declan this is Lauren, she's going to be here for a while."

Declan nodded, he didn't know why his dad introduced him as Louise's boy because he wasn't Louise's boy. He was his dad's boy. Declan didn't care he smiled shyly at Lauren. She knelt down to his height.

"Hi Declan, I'm Lauren. I'm a friend of your fathers." She smiled. She was very pretty, _she'll make a nice Mam._ Declan thought as he nodded, dashing off to play again.

Over the next few days his thoughts were confirmed, while his father was out on business Lauren would play with him, something his father and Louise never had time for. Declan was used to being a solitary child, one who kept to himself even when he was at the playground he didn't play with the other children.

A few months later his father was away on business and it was just him and Lauren, all seemed to be going well until, his father came back from a weekend away on business he and Lauren were playing hide and seek.

"He needs a Mam you know." His father said. Lauren froze and Declan ran over to her, confused as to why she'd stopped playing their game.

"I thought he was Louise's." Lauren whispered, bending down and picking him up, he clung to her not wanting her to leave.

"That's what I tell people but, he's not." His father said.

"Oh Ian…" Lauren breathed, holding Declan close to her. He felt the change in Lauren's behavior and whimpered clinging to her tighter than before.

"He needs a Mam." His father said again.

"Ian why didn't you tell me?" Lauren whispered, her voice hoarse. Suddenly he was very afraid she would leave and he clung tighter.

"Because I couldn't. We need to talk in private, Lauren." His father came over and pulled Declan from her grasp and set him down outside the room and locked the door. Declan immediately began crying and banging on the door to be let in. Sure they sometimes locked their bedroom door but neither one of them had ever outright locked him out.

"Lauren!" Declan cried. "Lauren!"

Lauren came out of the room a few minutes later, the side of her cheek red, and picked him up holding him to her. "shh, it's okay Declan, it's okay. I'm not going to leave you." He clung to her sobbing wildly.

"Declan." His father came out of the room. "I'm sorry for doing that but sometimes the adults need to talk in private."

Declan sniffled and clung to Lauren tighter. "Stay Lauren."

"Where would I go?" Lauren whispered stroking his hair soothingly, in a way only a mother could. "Ian, this boy needs a mother." She said to his father. "And I suppose I'll do it, but I won't give him your life."

"What life will you give him?" His father snarled, Declan expected Lauren to tense up like most people did in the presence of his father, but she didn't, she looked at him her eyes locked on his.

"I'll give him a happy one, Come on Declan I'll show you how to play the piano." She walked out of the room, Declan still on her hip, clinging to her tightly.

Declan loved to hear Lauren play the piano, he would've been perfectly content to sit on the floor and just listen until he fell asleep. Ian had other idea's though at around seven he came up to take the boy to bed.

"I want Lauren to come!" Declan cried in his high Irish voice.

"Alright, coming love?" His father asked, the last thing he heard before falling asleep was the final chord of "Irish Wedding" on the piano.

A few days later Declan woke in the middle of the night after a nightmare, and despite of his fathers rules he crept down the hall to where he and Lauren slept. The door was a jar and he opened it and stood next to the bed. It was Lauren who woke.

"Declan?" She asked.

"I had a bad dream." He whispered. "Can I sleep in here with you and Da?"

"Oh Declan honey I wish you could but you know your father's rules." She whispered, getting out of bed and picking him up. He felt the fabric of one of his father's t-shirts and he clung to Lauren as she took him back to his room.

"Will you stay?" He whispered.

"Only until you're asleep." She sighed, sitting down in the rocking chair that Louise kept in his room. After a few minutes Delcan was starting to fall asleep when the door creaked open.

"Lauren, whats going on?" His father asked.

"He had a nightmare." Lauren explained.

"Why didn't you just send him to bed on his own?" Ian asked.

"Because he's scared and you won't let him in our bed." She hissed.

"I don't care he can go to bed on his own." Ian snarled. Lauren set the boy in his bed, tucked him in and kissed his angelic blonde curls.

"Come on Ian, we'll let him sleep." Lauren took his hand and lead him out of the room.


	2. Don't Stop Counting

**Chapter 2 is short but kind of sad as well. **

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Two

**Don't Stop Counting. **

Declan was peering out the window, they were in Italy for a couple of days and his father and Lauren were in the garden, he was supposed to be taking a nap but the sound of shouts out side his window had woken him. He saw a bunch of men in black suits putting Lauren in a car. He started crying.

"Lauren! Lauren!" He shouted banging his tiny four year old hands on the window and crying a screaming for his father and Lauren. Louise rushed in and picked him out of bed.

"Declan, Declan its okay." She whispered stroaking his curls, but she wasn't what he wanted. He wanted Lauren to come tuck him back into bed, and his Da to come read to him. Still he clung to Louise sobbing and crying.

When he saw Lauren a few days later she looked different. She knelt to him. "Declan I have something to tell you okay?"

"What is it Lauren?" He asked, hugging her tightly.

"My name isn't Lauren okay? My name is Emily." She whispered.

"Emily?" He frowned. "Why?"

"Because Dec, you and I are going to play a game. Its kind of like hide an seek only we're going to hide you and Louise and me from your dad okay?" She whispered pulling the small boy into her lap.

"Okay La- Emily!" He grinned. "Where will we hide?"

"We're going to go to Boston you remember where it is right?" She asked.

"I remember!" HE grinned, she'd played a game with him a couple of weeks ago, where she would say of a city that was important and he had to find it.

"Okay so we're going to hide there and then Washington DC. Okay?" She smiled standing up and putting him on her hip.

"Okay when will Da find us?" He asked.

"Well your dad has to count for a long time okay?" Her voice had changed, she sounded like she might cry.

"Okay." He whispered, laying his head on her shoulder and falling into a deep restful sleep. When he woke he was on a plane, his head resting on her chest, she was reading to him softly.

"Hey, we're here." She whispered when she saw he'd woken.

"Okay." He yawned, she stood up and carried him off the plane. "What can Da stop counting?"

"In a long time." She whispered, and she was right his dad didn't stop counting for a long, long time.


	3. Conflict and Reason

**This chapter kind of differs from previous chapters. To make it clear if you haven't read Heroes and Thieves in this Chapter Emily and Derek are married, they've adopted Declan and have two kids of their own, Elizabeth (Lizi) and Isabella (Izzi)**

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Three

**Conflict and Reason**

14 year old Declan got out of bed at seven o'clock, he dressed quickly and walked down the hall, back pack slung over his shoulder. Emily was awake with baby Isabella in the kitchen. "Morning Emily." Declan yawned. "Is Derek back?"

"No, he's not." Emily sighed, she sounded exhausted "He promised he'd call tonight."

"He said that last night." Delcan grumble as he poured some cereal.

"I know he did, but these cases make people busy." She sighed, but it was clear she was just as upset as he was. Her eyes were a little red and though he didn't say anything he knew she'd been crying.

"Emily?" He whispered.

"Yeah Dec?" She sighed, picking Isabelle up from the baby swing.

"I miss Derek." He sighed.

"I know you do. I miss him to." She came over and hugged him. "Is something going on?"

"I just need to talk to Derek about something. Something private." He muttered.

"Can you talk to me?" She asked.

"No I kind of have to talk to Derek about it." Declan sighed.

"Okay." She kissed his hair. "I'm going to wake Elizabeth okay?"

"Okay." He sighed.

Emily went back to Elizabeth's bedroom and her phone rang from the table. Declan reached over and picked it up.

"Hello?" He asked.

"Hi Declan its JJ, can you put your mom on the phone?" She asked.

"Sure hang on." He went back into the nursery where Emily was gently waking Lizi. "Emily its for you." Emily took the phone and motioned for Declan to go finish his breakfast. Twenty minutes later Emily came into the kitchen, both small children dressed, a diaper bag in one hand.

"Where are we going?" He frowned. "My bus comes in five minutes?"

"You're not going to school today Dec, you and your sisters are going to Johnny's." She whispered, her voice wavering like she might cry. "G-get your back pack and Lizi okay?"

Declan frowned and slung his back pack over one shoulder and picked up his sister. He followed Emily to the car and quickly buckled Elizabeth into her seat and then sat in his seat. Emily drove quickly, wiping at her eyes. "Mom, what happened?"

"D-declan, Derek's been shot. He's in critical condition, I'll be back in a couple of days." She whispered. Declan felt a lump form in his throat, but he wasn't going to cry because if he started crying Lizi and Izzi would start crying.

When they arrived at Johnny's house he was waiting for them on the porch. He took Lizi from Declan and hugged Emily. "He'll be fine Em, you go see Derek and I'll take the kids for a few days."

"A-are you sure this is kind of last minute." She whispered.

"Yeah Em, its fine. Matthew will be here in a few hours and between the two of us we can handle three kids." He rolled his eyes.

"Thank you, I've got to go. Declan I love you okay, take care of your sisters." She hugged him.

"I-I will mom." He hugged her back. After she drove away he looked up at Johnny. "Will Derek be okay?"

"Yeah he will, he's been through worse." He whispers.

Five days later Emily was home, Derek would spend a couple more days in the hospital and then would return too. Declan looked over at Emily.

"Can I go visit?" He asked.

"I'll take you and your sister to visit tonight." Emily promised.

"No I want to go alone, the hospital's just a few miles away I can take the bus." Declan explained.

"Why Dec?" She asked.

"Because I need to talk to him." Declan insisted.

"What about?" Emily sighed.

"Sophia." He frowned.

"Sophia?" Emily raised an eyebrow. "Who's she?"

"A girl in my history class." Declan blushed.

"Alright, if you're back by six you can take the bus up to the hospital." She smiled.


	4. First Kiss

**In this chapter Derek and Emily are still married and Declan is around fifteen. **

**I am sorry about not updating recently I've just been very busy with life. :) hope you enjoy the chapter.  
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First Kiss

Declan walked out of the Kirov Academy of Ballet and sat on the steps, he'd received a text from Emily that Derek would be a little late showing up to pick him up. His forehead was beaded with sweat from 4 and a half hours of ballet practice. He pulled his book out of his bag and had just opened it to his page when someone sat down beside him. He looked up.

"Oh h-hi Sophia." He said, she was very pretty. When her long dark curls weren't in a bun they fell like a chocolate waterfall over her shoulders and back, her eyes sparkled like sapphires and her smile was the most dazzling thing he'd ever seen.

"Hello Declan." She smiled her light French accent making her all the more beautiful. "How was practice?"

"It was good I guess." Declan shrugged. Sophia reached for his hand, and Declan bit his lip, he'd known her since first grade they'd started ballet together they went to the same school and yet here he was at fifteen and barely able to talk to her. When did she get so beautiful? He wondered, he thought for a moment and decided it had been when she went to France to visit her grandparents last summer when she came back she was so beautiful he could hardly talk to her.

"I miss being with you in class." Sophia said suddenly, her blue eyes looking at their hands. In all honesty he had too, he'd really missed dancing with her but starting at 12 the classes had slowly changed from boys and girls to boys or girls. They were separate though this year was the first they hadn't had even character together.

"I miss you too." He whispered.

"You know life sometimes it does these things for a reason." She looked up at him, her blue eyes meeting his.

"What do you mean?" He asked, pretending not to notice as she edged closer to him.

"Sometimes it takes people being apart to realize how much they truly care for each other." She whispered and before he could stop himself Declan leaned in and kissed her, she seemed surprised at first but then she kissed him back. When he pulled away from her he noticed Derek sitting in the parking lot watching them.

"Will I see you tomorrow?" He asked hurriedly.

"Of course you will where would I go?" She smiled and walked off in the opposite direction. Declan grinned and walked to where Derek was waiting, after settling in the passenger seat he noticed Derek's smirk.

"What?" He asked.

"Well kid I think its time we talk about a little thing called condoms…"


	5. Sleep

**OKay in this chapter Declan is in his early 20's and home from a ballet company called "Ballet West" Based in Utah, for those of you who don't know anything about it, its the company featured in a documentary series called "Breaking Pointe" **

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Sleep

Declan rolled over on the bed, he couldn't sleep it was just too lonely here. He flicked on his lamp and rolled out of bed. It was past three in the morning but where she was it was only eleven, maybe she would still be awake. He picked up his phone and dialed her number, when she answered she sounded half asleep.

"Phia? You asleep?" He asked.

"No, I am not I want to be but I can't." The French accent rolls off her tongue as it always has. "I want to come home."

"No, no Sophia as much as I miss you this is a great opportunity for you. Pacific North West is a wonderful place for you to be." He whispered, he heard her sigh through the phone.

"Declan come down to your front yard." She ordered.

"Why?" He asked confused.

"Just do it." She sighed, Declan walked out of the bedroom and down the hall silently so as not to wake his sleeping sisters or Emily and Derek. When he opened the front door the bitter October air bit into his flesh.

"Okay I'm in the yard, would you please explain why?" He asks, but he gets no answer and realizes she's hung up on him.

"Oh sure I'll explain why." Declan turned and saw Sophia standing behind him.

"Phia, why did you come back?" He hugged her tightly and felt the gooseflesh crawling up her arms. "You're freezing come inside."

"I-I couldn't stay there it just wasn't worth it!" She whispered hugging him back and kissing him softly as they walked into the house.

"Okay, okay Sophia what – what are you going to do this is your dream we're talking about." Declan whispered leading her up the stairs into his room.

"I-I don't want to be somewhere I can't be with you." Sophia managed to get out.

"Me? Phia, I am not worth it, you need to achieve your dream." He tried. She gave him a look.

"Oh sure, you're not worth it." Her voice was sarcastic as she rolled her eyes. "You are worth it and aren't you supposed to be in Utah?"

"I came back for my little sister's birthday and to give a master class I'm only here for another few days." He snapped.

"And you're mad at me?" She rolled her eyes. Declan took a deep breath and hugged her again.

"I'm not mad at you I just don't see why you're going to give up Pacific North West if I'm going to be in Utah anyway." He sighed.

"Well I'm going to be in Utah too then." Sophia looked up at him her jaw set. "We are going to Utah together"

"You're really okay with that?" He asked

"I want to be a family Declan!" She sighed, this caught him off guard.

"Family?" He frowned.

"D-Declan I um, I f-found out three weeks ago, just after my arrival in Seattle…" She whispered looking down. "I'm sorry I am I just –" He cut her off by kissing her.

"Don't be sorry. You are coming to Utah with me, and we are going to have a baby and be a family." He whispered smiling at her.

"I-I've talked to the artistic director I'll dance for a few months, have the baby and then come back." She kissed him. "Now it is almost four am, we need some sleep." She crawled into his bed, patted the spot next to her. He turned off the light and got in bed, pulling her close to his body. He couldn't believe it, he was going to be a father and have a family with the woman he loved. He smiled to himself and fell asleep.


	6. Hesitation

**Okay so I'm not even gonna kid myself yeah these one shots are all connected in someway. This one takes place in lat August before the last chapter. **

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Hesitation

The two of them lay in bed panting and sweaty. Declan pulled Sophia to him feeling her warm bare flesh against his. He kissed her neck gently in comparison to their early activities. Outside he could hear a plane landing at the near by airport, a sad reminder of what was to come. He tightened his hold on Sophia and kissed her again. She wriggled briefly and turned to face him, kissing him sweetly.

"Declan, darling it is too hot to be like this." She whispered into his ear but making no movement to get out of his grasp.

"You're leaving tomorrow." He whispered back hiding his face in her neck, inhaling the smell of her hair – roses – and her skin – his own scent lingering on her body.

"You are to." She reached one hand back and ran it over the back of his neck and down his bare back.

He didn't say anything, just tightened his grip again, she was there for now but tomorrow she would be on a plane to Seattle and him to Salt Lake City. He thought once again of the Gimmal rings tucked in his suit case, he'd asked Emily for them last week with the intention of proposing to the beautiful woman lying in the bed with him he hadn't though he didn't want to change her mind.

Declan could feel her falling asleep pressed against him like this her breath light on his neck, their bodies intertwined. He knew he could get her to stay with him, by giving her that Gimmal right but he also knew that if he did that he would never forgive himself because she would drop her dream to come with him. He could never do that so instead he lay in bed awake all night relishing in the feel of his lover and friend's body pressed against his.

When at last the morning came and the two left the small dingy hotel room to go to the airport he saw something in her eyes.

"Whats up?" He asked, pulling into the parking lot where the rental cars were supposed to be left.

"Nothing I am just thinking." She dismissed pulling a hair brush out of her bag and brushing her dark freshly washed curls up into a long pony tail.

"About what?" He asked again his eyes never leaving her face.

"About us." She finally said.

"What about us?" He asked, his mouth dry worried she'd say she didn't want to have a long distance relationship with him.

"About how we're going to do this for a couple of months, then one day you'll do something stupid and show up at my apartment in Seattle proclaiming your great love for me when you're supposed to be in Utah." Sophia turned her dark eyes to him.

"What makes you think I'll do something stupid? And what about showing up at your apartment and proclaiming my love is stupid?" He muttered a little worried she'd figured out that was exactly his plan.

"I didn't say that was stupid I said you'd do something stupid that would result in you showing up at my apartment and proclaiming your love." She said.

"Well what makes that stupid?" Declan followed her out of the car and to the trunk.

"Because you'd be throwing away your entire l career for me." Sophia's face was set. "And I can't let you do that."

"So?" He again felt himself getting jittery worried she would cut it off.

"So, I'll see you at Thanksgiving okay? I'll come there and you can come to mine for Christmas okay?" She smiled kissing him.

"Y-you're not ending the relationship?" He asked.

"Do you want to?" She frowned.

"No." he admitted.

"Then lets make this work." She grinned wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him again and this time when he walked away from her towards his terminal he didn't see sadness in her eyes he saw determination, they would make this work she would make sure of that and she left him wishing he hadn't hesitated.

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**Also I am thinking of writing a multi-chapter fic with a plot about Declan and Sophia you can tell me what you'd think of this through the reviews or PM's, though honestly it might not sway the decision all that much. **


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